there have been several times where in my life where i felt completely abandoned.
growing up, my sisters and i were left by my mother at an early age. by third grade, my father had full custody of us.
my mother was an addict.
my father worked full time to support us.
by the age of 8, perhaps even earlier…
i had a completely unhealthy family environment.
i was in a one parent (barely) home.
this series of events led to a an environment that led me into a downward spiral that left me, eventually…
with a void so big that it felt like it could never be filled…
there...deep seeded in my broken down, torn apart heart, lingered loneliness, fear, abandonment, anger, hate, resentment...
for a long time, i didn't feel worthy of love because everybody who was supposed to love me- they l e f t.
i tired effortlessly for years and years of my life to fill this void in my heart.
drugs, alcohol, guys, cutting, control over my body by eating disorders, and eventually…
at an age that it would seem impossible to come to this conclusion...
i decided the only answer was to end my life…
lack of love…more importantly, lack of a father's love and acceptance (through no fault of his own…)
almost captured my life. and ended it, forever.
it wasn't until i encountered the love of God for the first time that i realized there is only one way to fill the void, abandonment and deep hurt that comes from being left and void of love…
by being found in Him alone.
unfortunately, being left and being heart broken is not something that goes away before or after we encounter God.
but being left by God is never an option.
read it again and let it sink in.
being left by God is never an option.
in fact, people are always going to fail us. leave us. hurt us.
people will always abuse L O V E.
but our Heavenly father never will.
at first it seems impossible to believe.
for those who have grown up w i t h o u t it, how can you trust God not to abuse love?
after all, isn't He the reason that your life turned out the way that they did?
the answer to this is one that arrived to me a couple of years ago…but the Holy Spirit revisited it just last week…
God cannot abuse L O V E…
because L O V E is not something He does…
rather, it is who HE is...
you see, God never inflicts harm, he doesn't purposely make your life painful…
when sin entered the world, pain entered. heartbreak entered. deceit entered. it was man's doing. we brought it.
HE doesn't create the storms. but he will allow for us to end up in the midst of them…
because it is there that he refines us.
it is there we find His undeniable love.
it is there we find our need for wholeness.
a desire for the void to be filled by something greater. something unfading, unfailing...
it is there He speaks, He whispers, He nudges...
it is there, in the loneliness, in the hurt from others, where we find…
Him. Cornerstone. always with us. Emmanuel.
He never intended for families to be broken.
He never intended one parent homes.
He never intended abandonment.
But once sin came, it all soon followed.
He doesn't initiate the storm…
but through them, He initiates a way back home.
"Be strong and courageous. For it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.” d e u t e r o n o m y 31:6
a way back home. a Father's love.
His love…a love that never fails.
His love: a love that fills.
His love: a love that heals.
His love: a love that is with us always.
no matter what your family life looked like…
parents or no parents…
father or not…
everybody is worthy of a love that never ceases. never abandons. never lies. never judges. and is always there.
o u r Father God. a Father's love. lives inside of you. and desires nothing more than for you to experience it.
“God’s beloved;
God’s permanent residence.
Encircled by God all day long,
within whom God is at home.”
d e u t o r o n o m y 33:12
He lives in YOU…He is at home in YOU...
HE LOVES YOU. HE LOVES YOU. HE LOVES YOU.
He S P E A K S to you…can you hear Him?
it is your God who goes with you. And He will never leave. Your Father goes with you. He will never leave.
amen.
xoxo,
caitlin
Tuesday, November 26, 2013
Saturday, November 2, 2013
p o w e r.
i had the honor of attending the Highlands reCreate women's conference about a month ago.
reCreate is an all women's two day conference that brings powerful speakers from all around the world, and who can forget my amazing pastor Chris Hodges and his wife Tammy.
the presence of God, the power of the Holy Spirit and Jesus right beside us.
powerful worship.
powerful worship.
fellowship with women.
empowering, strong messages from women
who have walked the faith walk with God longer than most of us and are completely submitted and obedient to Him.
as i'm sure you're thinking: four great ingredients for a women's conference.
i had attended last year.
it is incredible to watch how much difference 365 days makes in one person.
last year: a young woman. a stubborn woman. a distracted woman. a broken woman.
this year: a young (well, sort of) woman. a, well, still a stubborn, but less stubborn woman. a focused woman. a healing woman.
Going into to reCreate this year, i was in a different place. a new place. a refreshing place. a place i've longed for for years.
i am closer to Jesus than i ever knew i could be. and that's no sugar coated lie: that's the truth. here's why:
a few weeks ago, in the midst of battling, for the last several months an exhausting struggle with my self image: i woke up and decided to stand up in the strength of C H R i S T and made a decision i was done letting Him run my life.
i believe my exact words, were, while laying in my bed one morning after a week on bed rest after my appendectomy (yes, it was humorous praying for strength a week after surgery!) were as follows:
i am so over the enemy. and i'm done letting him run my life. done letting him keep me in fear.done letting him keep my family in strongholds, lost in a broken dark abyss. done letting him lie to me. but most importantly, i'm done letting him suck me dry of the J O Y, L i FE, p e a c e, and F R E E D O M that i know GOD HAS FOR ME.
with that being said, i simply began to thank GOD.
i thanked God for salvation. i got on my knees and bursted into tears confessing that if salvation, a relationship with Him and eternity were all He ever gave me, that would be enough to give Him endless praise!
by the way, this is true. Just by His sacrifice of Jesus alone makes Him forever worthy of ALL OF MY PRAISE AND WORSHIP, FOREVER.
an overwhelming presence of the Holy Spirit flooded over me and i began to become overwhelmed with thankfulness, aware of His goodness, His mercy, His grace, His protection, His provision, His plan, His will, His truth, His W O R D.
but most of all : H i s L O V E.
i tell you all of this not to brag on how W O N D E R F U L my relationship with God is, but of the condition i was in when i attended reCreate.
365 days ago, it was opposite.
i was grieving. i was hurt. fearful. insecure. unsure. busy. exhausted. i was, in a nutshell, ya girl wasn't feeling it.
these two young women: well, they were night and day.
here's the difference between then and now. really and truly:
i'm still stubborn. (SHOCKER.)
i'm still broken. (wouldn't want to be any other way.)
i still have questions. (but like, seriously. who doesn't?)
i'm still distracted. (wait…what was i just saying…?)
i'm still healing. (no, not from my appendectomy…emotionally..oh COME ON. it was funny and you know it.)
i am all of these things and more, but there is one difference:
j e s u s is alive in me. and He is more than POWERFUL enough to conquer all of these things.
more importantly: i have decided, that i am as to come to Him J U S T as i am. why? because it is too exhausting to be anything but myself.
i had the honor and the privilege of meeting LiSA BEVERE at reCreate. she spoke a word over me that was right on time. she said many things, all of which i will treasure in my heart forever.
one thing she spoke, as she looked into my eyes and had her arm around me stuck out to me:
there is freedom in being yourself.
there is freedom in being yourself.
there is freedom in being yourself.
i appreciate Lisa Bevere. i appreciate her getting up on stage in pleather, i appreciate her loud voice, her passion, and the strength that floods from her. i appreciate her humor, her boldness, and the transparency that she brings.
as she spoke her first message on L i o n e s s arising, i looked around the room in the auditorium at Highlands.
every single woman in that room was different. yet, when we began to worship, every single difference faded away and we were united.
while i was looking over God's word while writing this, the Lord led me to a chapter in Matthew 5:3, (yes, the beginning of the Sermon on the Mount!) that quite honestly, i used to avoid, for two different reasons.
when somebody dies, often m a t t h e w 5:4 is quoted. "blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted."
after my sweet mother went on to be with the Lord, all i heard was this verse. and honestly, i wasn't in a place for a long time where i could receive this and be at peace a year ago.
but now? i laugh and am overjoyed. what truth God's word speaks. it took time, and more significantly a major work of the holy spirit, but His word has kept promise in my life.
the next verse in Matthew 5:5 i didn't particularly avoid, it just always rubbed me the wrong way. perhaps because i never looked into what the word m e e k actually means and never truly understood it.
now here's the interesting part, God led me particularly to these words in Matthew. He brought me back to reflect on the most painful part of my past and revealed how His word has kept promise and not come back void.
He has comforted me and given me unexplainable peace in the loss of my mother.
as i was reading, the Holy Spirit led me down to the next verse.
"blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth."
the enemy's STUPID voice lingered in my head. yea, there's freedom in being yourself, and that's great…but…YOU'RE NOT MEEK. HA. you're the opposite. you're loud, obnoxious, you're anything but meek. you're not quiet. you're not meek. you're anything but. you won't be blessed and you won't inherit the earth.
now i know this seems dramatic, but honestly, the enemy gets me like this. He's a liar. Oh and he's also Satan so, yeah. He's like, super cruel.
picture this: i'm coming off of this incredible, Holy Spirit filled conference. Believing the truth, had just met my role model, i'm inspired, i'm filled, i'm free…and here comes the devil, while i'm reading my BIBLE. yes, to all the holy rollers, the enemy starts speaking to me while i'm reading the Word.
puzzled, while reflecting on the words that Lisa Bevere spoke, the image of all those women in the auditorium, and the empowerment that i felt flood me in my 2 days at reCreate, i looked up the definition of meek. i felt led to do it and so i did.
it blew my mind. OH IT BLEW MY MIND.
and it SHUT THE DEVIL UP.
3 different definitions:
i find the Lord hilarious. mainly because everybody is always saying He has no time agenda, but how T i M E L Y does He work in my life...
almost to date, 365 days, the Lord brought me back to His word to see His promise fulfilled in His word and in my life, and to teach me something new in this very season of my life, using the exact same tool: His word.
"see, i am doing a new thing! now it springs up, do you not perceive it? i will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert…" i s a i a h 43:19
a year ago- i could gain no peace from "blessed are those who mourn." i wasn't in a place with the Lord where i could receive that. i loved Him- but there were strongholds and walls that i couldn't let go of yet.
this season- a season of self discovery and finding who i am with him, i had been struggling with being "meek". i thought it was gentle. quiet. (which, let's be serious, if anybody knows me, you know i…well, i am a bull in a china shop who was born in Boston…so to say the least, i am not these things…
no, you are not these things, He says, but you are mine and i created you to be exactly who you are. and, no, nobody ever said you are required to be gentle and quiet, (maybe sometimes, my Daddy whispers, with a laugh.)
God decided to speak to me. to urge me with a gentle whisper from the Spirit, directing me back to a place of hurt, to reveal even more of His goodness, His faithfulness, His truth…
here He revealed the truth behind meek. humble, low of vanity, patient in affliction. obedient and submitted.
you are these things. Y o u r obedience to me determines the living power inside of you.
i don't know about any of you, but i need all of His power i can get. (CAN i GET A WiTNESS?!)
i can't do this on my own. without Him i am nothing.
i want to be humble.
i want to be low of vanity.
patient in affliction.
one hundred percent obedient and submitted to my Heavenly Father and His will for my life.
thank you, Jesus for reminding me that we are all different.
and for reminding this chick that our power to live for you and do your kingdom work doesn't come from our "characteristics" our "traits" our "skills" or our "abilities."
IT COMES FROM BEING 100% committed to you.
thank you God for your faithfulness. your truth {your word}
your power {that NOTHING is more powerful}
if you're reading:
you are His. you are meek. you are strong because of His power that lives in you. you're loved. cherished. protected. and c a l l e d.
He is faithful. Always F A i T H F U L.
He is power. ALL C O N S U M i N G.
And He is all we need.
this year: a young (well, sort of) woman. a, well, still a stubborn, but less stubborn woman. a focused woman. a healing woman.
Going into to reCreate this year, i was in a different place. a new place. a refreshing place. a place i've longed for for years.
i am closer to Jesus than i ever knew i could be. and that's no sugar coated lie: that's the truth. here's why:
a few weeks ago, in the midst of battling, for the last several months an exhausting struggle with my self image: i woke up and decided to stand up in the strength of C H R i S T and made a decision i was done letting Him run my life.
i believe my exact words, were, while laying in my bed one morning after a week on bed rest after my appendectomy (yes, it was humorous praying for strength a week after surgery!) were as follows:
i am so over the enemy. and i'm done letting him run my life. done letting him keep me in fear.done letting him keep my family in strongholds, lost in a broken dark abyss. done letting him lie to me. but most importantly, i'm done letting him suck me dry of the J O Y, L i FE, p e a c e, and F R E E D O M that i know GOD HAS FOR ME.
with that being said, i simply began to thank GOD.
i thanked God for salvation. i got on my knees and bursted into tears confessing that if salvation, a relationship with Him and eternity were all He ever gave me, that would be enough to give Him endless praise!
by the way, this is true. Just by His sacrifice of Jesus alone makes Him forever worthy of ALL OF MY PRAISE AND WORSHIP, FOREVER.
an overwhelming presence of the Holy Spirit flooded over me and i began to become overwhelmed with thankfulness, aware of His goodness, His mercy, His grace, His protection, His provision, His plan, His will, His truth, His W O R D.
but most of all : H i s L O V E.
i tell you all of this not to brag on how W O N D E R F U L my relationship with God is, but of the condition i was in when i attended reCreate.
365 days ago, it was opposite.
i was grieving. i was hurt. fearful. insecure. unsure. busy. exhausted. i was, in a nutshell, ya girl wasn't feeling it.
these two young women: well, they were night and day.
here's the difference between then and now. really and truly:
i'm still stubborn. (SHOCKER.)
i'm still broken. (wouldn't want to be any other way.)
i still have questions. (but like, seriously. who doesn't?)
i'm still distracted. (wait…what was i just saying…?)
i'm still healing. (no, not from my appendectomy…emotionally..oh COME ON. it was funny and you know it.)
i am all of these things and more, but there is one difference:
j e s u s is alive in me. and He is more than POWERFUL enough to conquer all of these things.
more importantly: i have decided, that i am as to come to Him J U S T as i am. why? because it is too exhausting to be anything but myself.
i had the honor and the privilege of meeting LiSA BEVERE at reCreate. she spoke a word over me that was right on time. she said many things, all of which i will treasure in my heart forever.
one thing she spoke, as she looked into my eyes and had her arm around me stuck out to me:
there is freedom in being yourself.
there is freedom in being yourself.
there is freedom in being yourself.
i appreciate Lisa Bevere. i appreciate her getting up on stage in pleather, i appreciate her loud voice, her passion, and the strength that floods from her. i appreciate her humor, her boldness, and the transparency that she brings.
as she spoke her first message on L i o n e s s arising, i looked around the room in the auditorium at Highlands.
every single woman in that room was different. yet, when we began to worship, every single difference faded away and we were united.
while i was looking over God's word while writing this, the Lord led me to a chapter in Matthew 5:3, (yes, the beginning of the Sermon on the Mount!) that quite honestly, i used to avoid, for two different reasons.
when somebody dies, often m a t t h e w 5:4 is quoted. "blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted."
after my sweet mother went on to be with the Lord, all i heard was this verse. and honestly, i wasn't in a place for a long time where i could receive this and be at peace a year ago.
but now? i laugh and am overjoyed. what truth God's word speaks. it took time, and more significantly a major work of the holy spirit, but His word has kept promise in my life.
the next verse in Matthew 5:5 i didn't particularly avoid, it just always rubbed me the wrong way. perhaps because i never looked into what the word m e e k actually means and never truly understood it.
now here's the interesting part, God led me particularly to these words in Matthew. He brought me back to reflect on the most painful part of my past and revealed how His word has kept promise and not come back void.
He has comforted me and given me unexplainable peace in the loss of my mother.
as i was reading, the Holy Spirit led me down to the next verse.
"blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth."
the enemy's STUPID voice lingered in my head. yea, there's freedom in being yourself, and that's great…but…YOU'RE NOT MEEK. HA. you're the opposite. you're loud, obnoxious, you're anything but meek. you're not quiet. you're not meek. you're anything but. you won't be blessed and you won't inherit the earth.
now i know this seems dramatic, but honestly, the enemy gets me like this. He's a liar. Oh and he's also Satan so, yeah. He's like, super cruel.
picture this: i'm coming off of this incredible, Holy Spirit filled conference. Believing the truth, had just met my role model, i'm inspired, i'm filled, i'm free…and here comes the devil, while i'm reading my BIBLE. yes, to all the holy rollers, the enemy starts speaking to me while i'm reading the Word.
puzzled, while reflecting on the words that Lisa Bevere spoke, the image of all those women in the auditorium, and the empowerment that i felt flood me in my 2 days at reCreate, i looked up the definition of meek. i felt led to do it and so i did.
it blew my mind. OH IT BLEW MY MIND.
and it SHUT THE DEVIL UP.
3 different definitions:
- Those without a lot of personal strength or power.
- Meekness is mentioned as one of the fruits of the Spirit, one of the characteristics of Christ.
- The Greek word used in the phrase means 'gentle'. It refers to those with a spirit that is free of vanity, who are willing and obedient to God's leading, and are humble and patient in affliction.
I want you to re-read this.
in my head, i'm thinking Lisa Bevere is the strongest woman of God I have ever met! She is bold, she is loud, she isn't afraid…
i have desperately desired to be a powerful speaker. the Lord stirs within me, a passion burning inside me just waiting to get out.
coming off of my R e C r e a t e adrenaline, inside i'm shouting…(something like this:)
i have desperately desired to be a powerful speaker. the Lord stirs within me, a passion burning inside me just waiting to get out.
coming off of my R e C r e a t e adrenaline, inside i'm shouting…(something like this:)
ALL HAIL TO BOLD POWERFUL WOMEN WHO AREN'T AFRAID TO SPEAK THEIR MINDS AND GET UP ON STAGE AND PREACH!i carry those characteristics! i am a warrior, a deborah for the kingdom! a fighter! GOD! i'm powerful! she's powerful! USE ME!
in that moment, the Holy Spirit directed me back towards this scripture: and i heard the Spirit speak to me, softly but sternly and say: SHE isn't powerful. She is meek. because she is obedient and submitted to God, He is powerful through her and because of that, she can preach on stage and be herself because she is found in Him.
she is P O W E R F U L because of who Christ is in HER.
next, a gentle tapping on my heart strings:
and you, you are meek too. the more obedient and submitted you become to me, then will you overflow with my living power inside of you.
and that power? nothing, no, nothing, my daughter can withhold that power.
she is P O W E R F U L because of who Christ is in HER.
next, a gentle tapping on my heart strings:
and you, you are meek too. the more obedient and submitted you become to me, then will you overflow with my living power inside of you.
and that power? nothing, no, nothing, my daughter can withhold that power.
here came the "OHHHHH" moment that Pastor Chris likes to refer to so often.
meek does make us weak.
and hallelujah to that.
because i don't want my own power.
relying on my own power does nothing for me.
meek doest mean we lay down on the ground, defenseless.
m e e k means we rely on something bigger: H i M. and (let me get all southern right here) AIN'T NOTHING MORE POWERFUL THAN OUR GOD. (those reading currently should be shouting, "AMEN!"
in H i m lies our strength:
THE MOST POWERFUL OF ALL POWER: THE RESURRECTION POWER can live, move, and work inside of us!
and hallelujah to that.
because i don't want my own power.
relying on my own power does nothing for me.
meek doest mean we lay down on the ground, defenseless.
m e e k means we rely on something bigger: H i M. and (let me get all southern right here) AIN'T NOTHING MORE POWERFUL THAN OUR GOD. (those reading currently should be shouting, "AMEN!"
in H i m lies our strength:
THE MOST POWERFUL OF ALL POWER: THE RESURRECTION POWER can live, move, and work inside of us!
i find the Lord hilarious. mainly because everybody is always saying He has no time agenda, but how T i M E L Y does He work in my life...
almost to date, 365 days, the Lord brought me back to His word to see His promise fulfilled in His word and in my life, and to teach me something new in this very season of my life, using the exact same tool: His word.
"see, i am doing a new thing! now it springs up, do you not perceive it? i will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert…" i s a i a h 43:19
a year ago- i could gain no peace from "blessed are those who mourn." i wasn't in a place with the Lord where i could receive that. i loved Him- but there were strongholds and walls that i couldn't let go of yet.
this season- a season of self discovery and finding who i am with him, i had been struggling with being "meek". i thought it was gentle. quiet. (which, let's be serious, if anybody knows me, you know i…well, i am a bull in a china shop who was born in Boston…so to say the least, i am not these things…
no, you are not these things, He says, but you are mine and i created you to be exactly who you are. and, no, nobody ever said you are required to be gentle and quiet, (maybe sometimes, my Daddy whispers, with a laugh.)
God decided to speak to me. to urge me with a gentle whisper from the Spirit, directing me back to a place of hurt, to reveal even more of His goodness, His faithfulness, His truth…
here He revealed the truth behind meek. humble, low of vanity, patient in affliction. obedient and submitted.
you are these things. Y o u r obedience to me determines the living power inside of you.
i don't know about any of you, but i need all of His power i can get. (CAN i GET A WiTNESS?!)
i can't do this on my own. without Him i am nothing.
i want to be humble.
i want to be low of vanity.
patient in affliction.
one hundred percent obedient and submitted to my Heavenly Father and His will for my life.
thank you, Jesus for reminding me that we are all different.
and for reminding this chick that our power to live for you and do your kingdom work doesn't come from our "characteristics" our "traits" our "skills" or our "abilities."
IT COMES FROM BEING 100% committed to you.
thank you God for your faithfulness. your truth {your word}
your power {that NOTHING is more powerful}
if you're reading:
you are His. you are meek. you are strong because of His power that lives in you. you're loved. cherished. protected. and c a l l e d.
He is faithful. Always F A i T H F U L.
He is power. ALL C O N S U M i N G.
And He is all we need.
X o X O,
c a i t l i n
c a i t l i n
Wednesday, July 10, 2013
b e y o n d here.
Disturb us, Lord, to dare more boldly,
To venture on wider seas
Where storms will show your mastery;
Where losing sight of land,
We shall find the stars.
i'm sitting here searching through my stickies on the background of my mac at starbucks. it's friday afternoon.
the above, the red is an excerpt it's from a poem that Pastor Craig Groeschel read in a sermon that he preached a while back.
the poem is called -disturb us, o Lord.-
B E A U T I F U L, isn't it?
the words pause you, don't they?
the poem stops me. takes my breath away. and makes me wonder.
when i read it, it shook me, down to the depths of my core. i don't know why i'm surprised. isn't that the way the Holy Spirit works?
that is why this post is centered around these 5 sentences. what they mean. and even more than that, what they mean specifically to me. because up until today, instead of dreams...i have been clouded with doubt. instead of looking further ahead, into the unknown, i have been trapped looking to the past.
i have lost sight of the shore, been tip toeing on rough waters hoping not to sink instead of holding tight the a n c h o r that centers my entire life.
let me preface you readers with a little intro with what's going on in my world.
things have been turned upside down in my world as of late: my family, my friendships, my school, my job, my future.
let's talk about vague. i don't think i could possibly be any more than i am being right now.
but that is because, in respect to all of these areas of my life, i have absolutely no idea what is going to happen.
and although Jesus has been my s a v i o r and lived in my heart for over two years now, the s o v e r e i g n i t y of Him in my life has been pushed away, by my own doing.
in plain english, i am admitting, yes, i am admitting, i am a control freak. and even funnier than that, i cannot handle change. which is odd. because on my strengthsquest test, i scored third in adaptability. which is being able to adapt. pretty much anywhere.
in the past few days when i have had no answers, and still have none, when i have been in what seems like the longest, most one sided waiting game i have ever possibly endured in my life (in case you didn't grasp that- it's been painful, oh and it isn't over yet), i have found myself saying over and over that i hate change.
i cannot handle it. it scares me.
but i scroll through the stickies on my mac today after a particularly emotionally draining day. and i find this poem. and i read it. over. and over. and over again.
and my fingers scroll down to this verse. and i close my eyes. and suddenly, my mind isn't clouded with and my brain isn't forecasted with doubt. but rather,
i am dreaming.
i am full of hope.
i am anchored to not only a future unknown, but anchored directly to the one who holds M E.
on a particularly drab, dark, cloudy day, the Holy Spirit prompted me with a thought...it was a gentle slap in the face, but nontheless, a slap in the face that woke me up and opened my eyes to a greater thought.
i am dreaming.
i am full of hope.
i am anchored to not only a future unknown, but anchored directly to the one who holds M E.
on a particularly drab, dark, cloudy day, the Holy Spirit prompted me with a thought...it was a gentle slap in the face, but nontheless, a slap in the face that woke me up and opened my eyes to a greater thought.
(by the way, i'm convinced that the Holy Spirit deals with me this way because it's just how I am. I am a yankee. He created me this way. A *gentle* slap in the face, jaw dropping revelation is usually what works best for me.)
#yankeeforlife <------ yes, that just happened. i hope you still continue to read! ;)
anyway, i continued to question why i still kept repeating over and over, i can't handle change. after all, i had scored "adaptability" in my top 3 strengths on my strengths quest test. in fact, i often feel i chase after change.
some have often called me impulsive because of how much i like change and adventure and moving and new decisions and new things!
i began to talk to myself. wait, i like change. so why...
why is everything unsure and shifting driving me insane right now? things are changing. so why can't i handle it?
HERE IT CAME: the answer, the slap, the revelation.
yes, caitlin, you like change. in fact you love it. but only when it's on your terms.
when you're controlling it, you love change.
um, ouch.
true. it's N E V E R easy to hear. but the Lord always graciously reveals the truth to us.
hard to hear, perhaps.
absolutely essential, y e s.
okay, so there i sat. and the the feeling wasn't condemnation. in fact, it was the opposite.
it was c o n v i c t i o n.
i flashed back to my last three years of my relationship with Christ.
one word kept appearing as my life flashed in pictures from the previous years.
s u r r e n d e r.
there are sweet moments. moments that i have experienced in my life...
full of conviction. revelation. surrender.
this was one of them.
so easily, we forget. that we are to l i v e and follow in Christ's footsteps.
it was a prompting in this moment of realization to s u r r e n d e r this spirit of control.
and to begin to dream...
b i g dreams.
dreams so big, dreams that can never happen without H i M.
the dreams that my father has e n g r a v e d deep in my heart.
they long, i long, He L O N G S for them to come to pass.
the beautiful, incredible part?
This is His will for our life.
reading this beautiful verse of the poem, i began to dig deep within His word.
saying "Lord, your will for my life" is one thing.
believing it, praying it, surrendering to Him completely and forsaking our control and O U R fleshly desires completely to follow Him...is a completely different story.
conviction began to set in when i opened my BiBLE.
in a great way.
J E S U S.
he knew. what was coming. he knew that enduring the c r o s s was what God willed Him to do. And greater, He K N E W that because of this s a c r i f i c e, this beautiful s u r r e n de r... He would be in paradise. He knew that people would find life, freedom, and salvation.
Eternity, glory, bliss, salvation, L I F E.
he knew death on a Cross was coming.
"And going a little farther, he fell on the ground and prayed that, if it were possible, the hour might pass from him. And he said, “Abba, Father, all things are possible for you. Remove this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will.”
m a r k 14:35-36
i don't know about anybody else, but i'm just being real. Even if I knew paradise was coming, freedom was coming for people, paid debts for the worst of sinners, i still am pretty sure i wouldn't end my prayer with, "but not what i want, but what YOU WANT."
the sacrifice and selflessness of Christ leaves me in awe.
it leaves me desiring to pray NOTHING other than Gods will for my life, and J U M P off cliffs, (not literally), run out onto the ocean waves, tossing and turning, unknown...
knowing only one thing: that i am right in the middle of His will
his good, pleasing and perfect will.
before all else, i have realized, this past few days...that i am MANY THINGS TO GOD...
but i am, fearlessly, A
D I S C I P L E O F CHRIST.
i made a decision to s u r r e n d e r. to Him. His plans. His way. His timing.
and that, does not change.
it doesn't change because HE is the same, yesterday, today, and forever. His word NEVER CHANGES.
it doesn't change when i feel discouraged.
psalm 69:32
Let all who seek God's help be encouraged.
it doesn't change when i am unsure and fearful of what is to come.
1 john 4:18.
perfect love casts out fear.
it doesn't change when i am tired, worn down.
matthew 11:29
in me, you will find rest for your souls.
it doesn't change when i am impatient.
romans 8:25
it doesn't change when STORMS come, and it gets rough.
john 16:33
But take heart! I have overcome the world.
it doesn't change when EVERYTHING is turned upside down, and i am left with no answers, clinging to the ONLY S U R E and promised H O P E in this world:
C H R I S T.
let's sum this up. He holds my future.
jeremiah 29:11
i don't need to know what the future holds. I just need to know the One who holds me.
keep dreaming BIG, the Holy Spirit says.
keep trusting me, God says.
keep following me, Jesus says.
"and we know that God works all things together for good for those who love Him."
and boy, do i love Him.
XOXO,
CAITLIN.
#yankeeforlife <------ yes, that just happened. i hope you still continue to read! ;)
anyway, i continued to question why i still kept repeating over and over, i can't handle change. after all, i had scored "adaptability" in my top 3 strengths on my strengths quest test. in fact, i often feel i chase after change.
some have often called me impulsive because of how much i like change and adventure and moving and new decisions and new things!
i began to talk to myself. wait, i like change. so why...
why is everything unsure and shifting driving me insane right now? things are changing. so why can't i handle it?
HERE IT CAME: the answer, the slap, the revelation.
yes, caitlin, you like change. in fact you love it. but only when it's on your terms.
when you're controlling it, you love change.
um, ouch.
true. it's N E V E R easy to hear. but the Lord always graciously reveals the truth to us.
hard to hear, perhaps.
absolutely essential, y e s.
okay, so there i sat. and the the feeling wasn't condemnation. in fact, it was the opposite.
it was c o n v i c t i o n.
i flashed back to my last three years of my relationship with Christ.
one word kept appearing as my life flashed in pictures from the previous years.
s u r r e n d e r.
there are sweet moments. moments that i have experienced in my life...
full of conviction. revelation. surrender.
this was one of them.
so easily, we forget. that we are to l i v e and follow in Christ's footsteps.
it was a prompting in this moment of realization to s u r r e n d e r this spirit of control.
and to begin to dream...
b i g dreams.
dreams so big, dreams that can never happen without H i M.
the dreams that my father has e n g r a v e d deep in my heart.
they long, i long, He L O N G S for them to come to pass.
the beautiful, incredible part?
This is His will for our life.
reading this beautiful verse of the poem, i began to dig deep within His word.
saying "Lord, your will for my life" is one thing.
believing it, praying it, surrendering to Him completely and forsaking our control and O U R fleshly desires completely to follow Him...is a completely different story.
conviction began to set in when i opened my BiBLE.
in a great way.
J E S U S.
he knew. what was coming. he knew that enduring the c r o s s was what God willed Him to do. And greater, He K N E W that because of this s a c r i f i c e, this beautiful s u r r e n de r... He would be in paradise. He knew that people would find life, freedom, and salvation.
Eternity, glory, bliss, salvation, L I F E.
he knew death on a Cross was coming.
"And going a little farther, he fell on the ground and prayed that, if it were possible, the hour might pass from him. And he said, “Abba, Father, all things are possible for you. Remove this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will.”
m a r k 14:35-36
i don't know about anybody else, but i'm just being real. Even if I knew paradise was coming, freedom was coming for people, paid debts for the worst of sinners, i still am pretty sure i wouldn't end my prayer with, "but not what i want, but what YOU WANT."
the sacrifice and selflessness of Christ leaves me in awe.
it leaves me desiring to pray NOTHING other than Gods will for my life, and J U M P off cliffs, (not literally), run out onto the ocean waves, tossing and turning, unknown...
knowing only one thing: that i am right in the middle of His will
his good, pleasing and perfect will.
before all else, i have realized, this past few days...that i am MANY THINGS TO GOD...
but i am, fearlessly, A
D I S C I P L E O F CHRIST.
i made a decision to s u r r e n d e r. to Him. His plans. His way. His timing.
and that, does not change.
it doesn't change because HE is the same, yesterday, today, and forever. His word NEVER CHANGES.
it doesn't change when i feel discouraged.
psalm 69:32
Let all who seek God's help be encouraged.
it doesn't change when i am unsure and fearful of what is to come.
1 john 4:18.
perfect love casts out fear.
it doesn't change when i am tired, worn down.
matthew 11:29
in me, you will find rest for your souls.
it doesn't change when i am impatient.
romans 8:25
But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience.
it doesn't change when STORMS come, and it gets rough.
john 16:33
But take heart! I have overcome the world.
it doesn't change when EVERYTHING is turned upside down, and i am left with no answers, clinging to the ONLY S U R E and promised H O P E in this world:
C H R I S T.
let's sum this up. He holds my future.
jeremiah 29:11
i don't need to know what the future holds. I just need to know the One who holds me.
keep dreaming BIG, the Holy Spirit says.
keep trusting me, God says.
keep following me, Jesus says.
"and we know that God works all things together for good for those who love Him."
and boy, do i love Him.
XOXO,
CAITLIN.
Wednesday, March 27, 2013
i get by with a little help from my friends.
i'm convinced that one of the slickest ways the enemy can capture us and keep us from ever encountering true L O V E is through isolation.
those are you reading would probably say: duh. THAT'S OBVIOUS.
but if it's so obvious, why does it happen to so many people? all of the time?
it's not creative. it's not genius. it's not even smart. but it happens.
and it's happened to me.
lately, but especially in this week of Jesus laying down His life for us, it has hit me like a ton of bricks.
that the greatest gift, (besides salvation and a relationship with Him), and greatest d e s i r e of His heart is for His children, you and i, to have R E A L, honest, c h r i s t l i k e friendships.
w a r n i n g: this post is vulnerable. it's trademarked. caitlin ritchie style. it's R E A L. it isn't going to lie, sugar coat, or dance around the subject. it's my heart.
i have spent the last 7 months in a daze of mixed emotions towards 5 girls that i live with.
YES. I SAID F I V E.
we are, looking at us individually, the 6 absolute most different young women you could ever meet.
some are loud, some are quiet. some have a shoe collection that far outweighs the total combined of all five other girls shoe collection....(no names mentioned...although we all know that would be me...) and some would rather be barefoot. (WHY?!)
we are different. we are different. we are all different.
and the very thing that brought us all together, that should U N I T E us has been far overlooked by me for the past several months.
two things: very important.
NUMBER ONE: WE ARE CREATED IN GODS IMAGE. JUST HOW HE DESIRED FOR US TO BE CREATED. WE WERE ALL INTRICATELY WOVEN to fit His mold, just as He wanted us. DIFFERENT. UNIQUE. GOD is not a boring God, but a rather beautiful, majestic, masterpiece maker who had each of us individually in mind in the beginning of creation.
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful P S A L M 139:14
NUMBER TWO: the world lies to us and tells us that being different isn't normal and that we need to conform to being just like somebody else.
LIE! that is a lie from the enemy.
the thing is, we're all like a deck of cards. you can't play a game without just one card missing. if even one is missing, the game cannot be played properly. there is a void.
what most Christians fail to realize is that without one another, there is a void. WE, as sinners, of course don't realize it because...well it's just that. we're full of S I N.
but our daddy in Heaven realizes it. and it desperately grieves HIM when we discredit, discount, and most importantly, let the enemy BLIND us...
and keep YOU AND I from encountering true love, loyalty, and joy in friendships with the INCREDIBLE men (if you are a man) and and women (if you are a woman- POWER!) of GOD that HE HAS DIVINELY PLACED IN OUR LIVES.
p r o v e r b s 27:17 says, "Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another."
GOD put these people in our lives to help us, to love us, because he knows that WE NEED PEOPLE. our deck of cards is not full without PEOPLE.
e c c l e s i a s t e s says it like this, it's such a beautiful verse filled with such power. AND WHERE POWER IS, THE DEMONS HATE IT. AND WHERE POWER IS SPOKEN, WHERE IT IS PRESENT, WHERE IT IS PRAYED FOR, THE ENEMY FLEES.
"Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up! Again, if two lie together, they keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone? And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him—a threefold cord is not quickly broken." e c c l e s i a s t e s 4:9-12
look, this could start to get a little preachy, but it needs to be said. and it can be said with a little Boston emphasis on it, because it's something i have been walking through, struggling with, aching over, been rebuked for, convicted of, and even condemned from the enemy for feeling..
IT'S REAL. IT'S HAPPENING. IT'S A LIE. AND THERE IS FREEDOM FROM IT.
and it's our job to end it. NOW.
WE ARE NOT CALLED TO WALK THIS LIFE ALONE. it is not our job to DISCOUNT the people God has placed in our lives.
they are there for a r e a s o n.
and if we love God, we let His sovereignty reign in our life and believe it is E V E R P R E S E N T.
we do not get to pick and choose when and where and what areas of our life we choose to let Him reign and then decide the rest for ourselves.
the thing i didn't realize, up until, well, to be honest, up until two days ago, is that this is a sin. and it is masqueraded by the enemy telling us lies about people.
but it's not ONLY that. you see, for the enemy to have a foothold to place these thoughts about people in my head means that i OPENED the door for him to be able to.
i found myself wanting to be away from people and discounting needing friends because they IRRITATE ME. because i'm selfish. because i'm easily irritated. i let my anger get the best of me. i'm impatient. and insecure.
and all of this leads to isolation. and room for deterioration of friendships. which are E S S E N T I A L.
and this, my friends, is living opposite of the fruit of the spirits that God commands us to live by. see, when i pray to live in the fruit of the S P i R i T, and i remember the C R O S S , I desire, seek, and welcome the love, the joy, the support, the laughter, the tears, the true genuineness of friendship.
when we live not only with an army of people around us who are there, walking with us through life...
with arms there to hold you, when you can't stand...
with a smile there when you can't seem to form one yourself...
with laughter that fills your heart when it feels empty...
with words that carry kindness that couldn't possibly imagine in times of despair...
L I F E is simply better.
and...
even better. when we accept, with loving and open arms the people, no matter how different they are, that our Daddy has intricately placed in every season, on every path, through this walk of L i F E...
we are walking in His will. His desire for us. AND His desire is for us to be loved.
God gives us p e o p l e.
it our choice to make them our f r i e n d s.
and f r i e n d s, are a d r e a m. they are a j o y. they are t r e a s u r e s. they are b e a u t i f u l. they are b l e s s i n g s. they are l o v e.
this last week has taught me...just how blessed i am. how loved i am. how humbly my "people", my "army", my "girls", my "sisters in Christ", "my boo- thangs", my "girlfrands" walk in f o r g i v e n e s s. in p a t i e n c e. in L O V E.
i don't know if you people that are reading this know this, but i am difficult. i am caitlin. i am me. i am a sinner. i can be, at times: all of THESE things: quite impatient. selfish. insecure. moody. emotional. a train wreck at times. loud. messy. rude. mean. irresponsible. unforgiving.
and just as i was writing this, i can honestly tell you there is no condemnation from the D E V I L in this gal, because i am I M P E R F E C T.
but in my weakness Christ is strong. and as long as i am walking with Him, humbly, accepting His lessons, trusting and hearing His voice, and abiding in His will,
i'm doing just f i n e. better than f i n e. w o n d e r f u l.
with my K i n g by my side, no matter where i turn...i'm doing just fine. :)
my f r i e n d s. divinely placed.
full of acceptance. a shelter from the storms...(because they come.)
to encourage...(because He never promised this life would be easy all the time)
to sharpen. (because let's face it, women are incredibly smart.)
to pray. (because a praying woman can destroy the devil more than if he was in a battle with the incredible hulk, of this i am SURE.)
to bless. (and yes, when i wrote this, chocolate and flowers were the first thing that came to my mind. sue me. i am a woman. we love these things.)
to rebuke.(to those of you who are reading this and aren't a Christian, this is a fancy shmancy word for "CALL OUT." because let's face it. there are times when we need to be.)
but most importantly, friends are here to l o v e. and no, we cannot l i v e without it. or them.
in fact, we will wither away.
this week, i have come a l i v e again. in a way i could never have imagined past my wildest dreams.
blinders have fallen off, and my heart has been torn out of it's hardened shell, thanks to a few beautiful, incredible, God fearing women who have loved me with an endless, Christ like love.
and i would like to thank those women. and remind them how beautiful they are.
thank you for being different. thank you for being you. thank you for answering the call that God has placed on you. and thank you..for never, ever giving up on me.
D i S C L A i M E R: to anybody who is not a Christian, who has read this, whose heart has been stirred, convicted, or maybe broken because you have taken the people God has placed in your life for granted: remember forgiveness lies in Christ and His biggest desire is for you to enjoy life with p e o p l e. friends are biblical. and He desires for you to have them.
Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.
J O H N 15:13
Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.
1 thessalonians 5:11
Oil and perfume make the heart glad, and the sweetness of a friend comes from his earnest counsel.
proverbs 27:29
That is, that we may be mutually encouraged by each other's faith, both yours and mine.
romans 1:12
MEGAN- thank you for being you. for walking so humbly in love, patience, and understanding. you are an incredible Woman of God. Jesus shines through you.
MARYCATHERINE- there is nobody like you. the Holy Spirit lives and breathes through you, the call on your life is unlike any other. you are truly beautiful. a woman of wisdom.
HALEY- your laughter makes my heart happy. you are a woman all your own, and your identity lying firmly in Christ is truly evident. you are perhaps one of the funniest, kind hearted, light hearted woman i've ever met . you are the epitome of a "take me as i come" friend, and are incredibly faithful.
ANNA- you know i have love for my northern girl. there is nobody like you in the world. you are a comfort, a smile, a brightened room and an open arms, safe haven for me. my heart feels nothing but trust and solidity in our friendship. NORTHERN aggression forever.
JINNY- the sweetest. never have i met a more dedicated, talented, humble person. plus, that girl can cook. your hugs are the best. thank you for accepting me for who i am and loving me always where i'm at. you are amazing. amazing.
there are plenty more who i am speaking to in my life. my sisters, my several other friends. you have all touched my heart and changed my life forever. i love you all. i don't tell you enough. i fail you all the time. i take you all for granted. but you are treasures. you are beautiful. and you are the GREATEST gifts Jesus could ever give me.
xoxo,
C A i T L i N
those are you reading would probably say: duh. THAT'S OBVIOUS.
but if it's so obvious, why does it happen to so many people? all of the time?
it's not creative. it's not genius. it's not even smart. but it happens.
and it's happened to me.
lately, but especially in this week of Jesus laying down His life for us, it has hit me like a ton of bricks.
that the greatest gift, (besides salvation and a relationship with Him), and greatest d e s i r e of His heart is for His children, you and i, to have R E A L, honest, c h r i s t l i k e friendships.
w a r n i n g: this post is vulnerable. it's trademarked. caitlin ritchie style. it's R E A L. it isn't going to lie, sugar coat, or dance around the subject. it's my heart.
i have spent the last 7 months in a daze of mixed emotions towards 5 girls that i live with.
YES. I SAID F I V E.
we are, looking at us individually, the 6 absolute most different young women you could ever meet.
some are loud, some are quiet. some have a shoe collection that far outweighs the total combined of all five other girls shoe collection....(no names mentioned...although we all know that would be me...) and some would rather be barefoot. (WHY?!)
we are different. we are different. we are all different.
and the very thing that brought us all together, that should U N I T E us has been far overlooked by me for the past several months.
two things: very important.
NUMBER ONE: WE ARE CREATED IN GODS IMAGE. JUST HOW HE DESIRED FOR US TO BE CREATED. WE WERE ALL INTRICATELY WOVEN to fit His mold, just as He wanted us. DIFFERENT. UNIQUE. GOD is not a boring God, but a rather beautiful, majestic, masterpiece maker who had each of us individually in mind in the beginning of creation.
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful P S A L M 139:14
NUMBER TWO: the world lies to us and tells us that being different isn't normal and that we need to conform to being just like somebody else.
LIE! that is a lie from the enemy.
the thing is, we're all like a deck of cards. you can't play a game without just one card missing. if even one is missing, the game cannot be played properly. there is a void.
what most Christians fail to realize is that without one another, there is a void. WE, as sinners, of course don't realize it because...well it's just that. we're full of S I N.
but our daddy in Heaven realizes it. and it desperately grieves HIM when we discredit, discount, and most importantly, let the enemy BLIND us...
and keep YOU AND I from encountering true love, loyalty, and joy in friendships with the INCREDIBLE men (if you are a man) and and women (if you are a woman- POWER!) of GOD that HE HAS DIVINELY PLACED IN OUR LIVES.
p r o v e r b s 27:17 says, "Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another."
GOD put these people in our lives to help us, to love us, because he knows that WE NEED PEOPLE. our deck of cards is not full without PEOPLE.
e c c l e s i a s t e s says it like this, it's such a beautiful verse filled with such power. AND WHERE POWER IS, THE DEMONS HATE IT. AND WHERE POWER IS SPOKEN, WHERE IT IS PRESENT, WHERE IT IS PRAYED FOR, THE ENEMY FLEES.
"Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up! Again, if two lie together, they keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone? And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him—a threefold cord is not quickly broken." e c c l e s i a s t e s 4:9-12
look, this could start to get a little preachy, but it needs to be said. and it can be said with a little Boston emphasis on it, because it's something i have been walking through, struggling with, aching over, been rebuked for, convicted of, and even condemned from the enemy for feeling..
IT'S REAL. IT'S HAPPENING. IT'S A LIE. AND THERE IS FREEDOM FROM IT.
and it's our job to end it. NOW.
WE ARE NOT CALLED TO WALK THIS LIFE ALONE. it is not our job to DISCOUNT the people God has placed in our lives.
they are there for a r e a s o n.
and if we love God, we let His sovereignty reign in our life and believe it is E V E R P R E S E N T.
we do not get to pick and choose when and where and what areas of our life we choose to let Him reign and then decide the rest for ourselves.
the thing i didn't realize, up until, well, to be honest, up until two days ago, is that this is a sin. and it is masqueraded by the enemy telling us lies about people.
but it's not ONLY that. you see, for the enemy to have a foothold to place these thoughts about people in my head means that i OPENED the door for him to be able to.
i found myself wanting to be away from people and discounting needing friends because they IRRITATE ME. because i'm selfish. because i'm easily irritated. i let my anger get the best of me. i'm impatient. and insecure.
and all of this leads to isolation. and room for deterioration of friendships. which are E S S E N T I A L.
and this, my friends, is living opposite of the fruit of the spirits that God commands us to live by. see, when i pray to live in the fruit of the S P i R i T, and i remember the C R O S S , I desire, seek, and welcome the love, the joy, the support, the laughter, the tears, the true genuineness of friendship.
when we live not only with an army of people around us who are there, walking with us through life...
with arms there to hold you, when you can't stand...
with a smile there when you can't seem to form one yourself...
with laughter that fills your heart when it feels empty...
with words that carry kindness that couldn't possibly imagine in times of despair...
L I F E is simply better.
and...
even better. when we accept, with loving and open arms the people, no matter how different they are, that our Daddy has intricately placed in every season, on every path, through this walk of L i F E...
we are walking in His will. His desire for us. AND His desire is for us to be loved.
God gives us p e o p l e.
it our choice to make them our f r i e n d s.
and f r i e n d s, are a d r e a m. they are a j o y. they are t r e a s u r e s. they are b e a u t i f u l. they are b l e s s i n g s. they are l o v e.
this last week has taught me...just how blessed i am. how loved i am. how humbly my "people", my "army", my "girls", my "sisters in Christ", "my boo- thangs", my "girlfrands" walk in f o r g i v e n e s s. in p a t i e n c e. in L O V E.
i don't know if you people that are reading this know this, but i am difficult. i am caitlin. i am me. i am a sinner. i can be, at times: all of THESE things: quite impatient. selfish. insecure. moody. emotional. a train wreck at times. loud. messy. rude. mean. irresponsible. unforgiving.
and just as i was writing this, i can honestly tell you there is no condemnation from the D E V I L in this gal, because i am I M P E R F E C T.
but in my weakness Christ is strong. and as long as i am walking with Him, humbly, accepting His lessons, trusting and hearing His voice, and abiding in His will,
i'm doing just f i n e. better than f i n e. w o n d e r f u l.
with my K i n g by my side, no matter where i turn...i'm doing just fine. :)
my f r i e n d s. divinely placed.
full of acceptance. a shelter from the storms...(because they come.)
to encourage...(because He never promised this life would be easy all the time)
to sharpen. (because let's face it, women are incredibly smart.)
to pray. (because a praying woman can destroy the devil more than if he was in a battle with the incredible hulk, of this i am SURE.)
to bless. (and yes, when i wrote this, chocolate and flowers were the first thing that came to my mind. sue me. i am a woman. we love these things.)
to rebuke.(to those of you who are reading this and aren't a Christian, this is a fancy shmancy word for "CALL OUT." because let's face it. there are times when we need to be.)
but most importantly, friends are here to l o v e. and no, we cannot l i v e without it. or them.
in fact, we will wither away.
this week, i have come a l i v e again. in a way i could never have imagined past my wildest dreams.
blinders have fallen off, and my heart has been torn out of it's hardened shell, thanks to a few beautiful, incredible, God fearing women who have loved me with an endless, Christ like love.
and i would like to thank those women. and remind them how beautiful they are.
thank you for being different. thank you for being you. thank you for answering the call that God has placed on you. and thank you..for never, ever giving up on me.
D i S C L A i M E R: to anybody who is not a Christian, who has read this, whose heart has been stirred, convicted, or maybe broken because you have taken the people God has placed in your life for granted: remember forgiveness lies in Christ and His biggest desire is for you to enjoy life with p e o p l e. friends are biblical. and He desires for you to have them.
Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.
J O H N 15:13
Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.
1 thessalonians 5:11
Oil and perfume make the heart glad, and the sweetness of a friend comes from his earnest counsel.
proverbs 27:29
That is, that we may be mutually encouraged by each other's faith, both yours and mine.
romans 1:12
MEGAN- thank you for being you. for walking so humbly in love, patience, and understanding. you are an incredible Woman of God. Jesus shines through you.
MARYCATHERINE- there is nobody like you. the Holy Spirit lives and breathes through you, the call on your life is unlike any other. you are truly beautiful. a woman of wisdom.
HALEY- your laughter makes my heart happy. you are a woman all your own, and your identity lying firmly in Christ is truly evident. you are perhaps one of the funniest, kind hearted, light hearted woman i've ever met . you are the epitome of a "take me as i come" friend, and are incredibly faithful.
ANNA- you know i have love for my northern girl. there is nobody like you in the world. you are a comfort, a smile, a brightened room and an open arms, safe haven for me. my heart feels nothing but trust and solidity in our friendship. NORTHERN aggression forever.
JINNY- the sweetest. never have i met a more dedicated, talented, humble person. plus, that girl can cook. your hugs are the best. thank you for accepting me for who i am and loving me always where i'm at. you are amazing. amazing.
there are plenty more who i am speaking to in my life. my sisters, my several other friends. you have all touched my heart and changed my life forever. i love you all. i don't tell you enough. i fail you all the time. i take you all for granted. but you are treasures. you are beautiful. and you are the GREATEST gifts Jesus could ever give me.
xoxo,
C A i T L i N
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