i don't know if there's ever been any person in history that's been excited to hear the word through.
although it carries many definitions, (yes, i'm a dictionary nerd), none seem too appealing to me.
maybe it's because it's been the word spoken over the season and circumstances that i'm in my life in right now.
yes, maybe that's why i'm not a big fan of the word through.
definition: during the whole period of; throughout: ...it just sounds like work, doesn't it?
this is just a season i'm walking through. this is just something i have to go through.
through basically means you're not going around something. it means that there's no running, avoiding, hiding, or, most times, ANY way around it.
through does have one definition that made me smile and breathe a sigh of relief:
to have reached the end of something.
but...to reach the end of something, you have to go through it first, right? I've "RUN" two half marathons.
never have i wanted to reach the end of something so badly. but staring at the narrow pavement in front of me,
i knew one thing. i was going through it. ain't no way around it.
but the reward for enduring, for going through, was COMPLETION. add it to the list.
you then get to say, "i went THROUGH that."
CONQUERED IT.
and i came out on the other side of it. i had MADE it THROUGH. granted, i was LIMPING. CRYING. HURTING. IN PAIN. BARELY THERE. BUT I MADE IT. and my BODY. and my SOUL. and my SPIRIT. were better for it.
i can't help but to imagine what the journey of Jesus carrying the Cross was like for Him. in fact, in all honesty it's too much sometimes to even handle. sweat, blood, tears, mockery, beating, struggling, barely breathing, about to collapse (to name a FEW.)
i've had a lot of people tell me not to claim sickness, disease, and tell me this lot in my life.
i've had a lot of people who may see me with a lack of faith because i'm not healed yet. i've literally been diagnosed for 3 weeks.
i've had and heard a lot of opinions from a lot of people. and that's okay. we all have opinions. Jesus knows i have mine.
but all i keep hearing from the Holy Spirit is the word through.
i like to argue with God sometimes (SHOCK) and I began to think...Lord, I've been through enough. I mean honestly. HOW SELFISH!
i had a meeting with a guy the other day. It was a particularly bad day for me physically. I woke up nauseous, weak, and in so much pain i could barely breathe. there is a constant pit in my stomach and pain in my legs and arms that never goes away.
the same day, both my legs just gave out on me in the middle of target because i was so weak.
this guy, a Christian, listened to me talk about my journey. my testimony. my life before Christ. my life with Him now. I talked and talked (which is completely out of character for me...NOT)
finally, i said, i'm not sure why i'm going through it and i'm not sure when Jesus is going to heal me, and to be honest it doesn't matter. There is PURPOSE.
then, he looked at me and what he said was something that aligned with what the Holy Spirit had been speaking the whole time.
"you already have your healing. the pain that you are enduring is SiMiLiAR to the drops of blood that fell from his journey with the Cross, you have your healing already, but you have to go through a grueling, painful journey to get through to the other side."
UMMMM, HELLO.
Jesus knew redemption and victory would be His but He had to go through. THROUGH. THROUGH. THROUGH.
he endured. he went through. for others.
lots would disagree.
i agree completely.
it won't be paradise. but it will be something greater. an equipping and tools for ministry that will grow the Kingdom of God.
i don't know why Satan thinks that for some reason i'll lose my faith in this experience. which, in all honesty, has been the hardest journey.
to me, He just keeps building my resume.
there are hurting people in the world. ones that have been hurt as badly and even worse than i have been.
and one day, i will look across, face to face, eye to eye to those women and be able to say with confidence and assurance: i've been through what you're going through. and Jesus is faithful to bring you THROUGH.
so the sickness in my body?
GENESiS 50:20 "don't you see? you planned evil against me, but God USED those same plans for my good, as you see all around you right now- LiFE. and life for many people." (MSG)
so no. i'm not going to stop being vulnerable. i will stop talking about what i'm going through, or sharing my story. i will not stop encouraging others. i REFUSE to think of this journey as anything but an absolute honor from my Father.
who am i that He would choose to be a vessel for His glory, His kingdom, His miracles, His spirit? seriously, instead of complaining about our issues...(and if you don't know by now, i have just a tad going on....) why can't we THANK God for what He is going to do through us, if we would just be willing to let Him and OBEY Him when He calls us: "it's time. it's time to go through it."
since when did we tell God "I'll do anything for you, and then complain or rebuke off any bad thing that happens to us?
for those of you who disagree: sickness and disease is not my lot in life. it doesn't define me. and it will not be who i am forever. but it is right now.
and it is filling my life with grace, faith, trust, and the presence and comfort of the Holy Spirit like NEVER before.
yes. it's TERRIFYING. feeling like i'm losing my mind, not being able to think clearly. watching my cognitive thinking go down the drain.arthritis invading my joints. dibilitating muscle aches that make me move like a 90 yr old woman. positive blood tests. my central nervous system out of control. constant pain and anxiety.
i am honored that he would call me on a yet another journey to go through. yes, honored. flattered.
IN OUR WEAKNESS // HE IS MADE STRONG.
He HAS incredible plans. AND HE WILL GET THE GLORY. and in the meantime, people WILL come to know JESUS. my FAITH will be proclaimed LOUDER. people will see MIRACLES. my HEALING will come. my family will undoubtedly see JESUS in me. and who knows what's gonna happen.
but i can tell you one thing: it's gonna be GOOD. "that's why we can be so sure that every detail in our lives of love for God is worked into something good." R o M A N S 8:28 (MSG)
i have had an outpouring of people, some i know, and some i don't. your faith is inspiring. some in the Lyme community. some not. some Christians. some NOT. THAT MATTERS TO ME. AND IT MATTERS TO GOD. if i could inspire just one through this journey, if just one comes to know Jesus or even begins to stir in their faith, to me, that is VICTORY.
so yes, i think i'll make a choice everyday to write: to write about how i feel, what God is doing, brutal honesty. and i hope you'll keep reading and following. and by the way, to blog these days, it takes me hours. once a grammar freak, now i constantly mis spell words. my vision is almost completely blurry. my hands ache and ache and ache.
but i'm not stopping.
let me encourage you from one of my favorite and life verses, from the NLT but it's even more in your face in the MSG, which for anybody knows me is how i play. IN YO FACE. no filter. just real talk.
"if you only look AT us, you might as well miss the brightness. we carry the precious Message around in the unadorned clay pots of our ordinary lives. that's to prevent anyone from confusing God's incomparable power with us. as it is, there's not much chance of that. you know for yourselves that we're not much to look at. we've been surrounded and battered by troubles, but we're not demoralized; we're not sure what to do, but we know what God knows what to do, we've been spiritually terrorized, but God hasn't left our side, we've been thrown down, but we haven't been broken. what they did to Jesus, they do to us- trial and torture, mockery and murder; what Jesus did among them, he does in us- HE LIVES. our lives are at constant risk for Jesus's sake, which makes Jesus's life all the more evident in us. While we're going through the worst, you're getting in on the best." 2 coRiNTHiANS 4:7-12
INSTAGRAM: @caitlinannritchie TWITTER: @CaitlinRitchie6 GMAIL: ritchie.caitlin@gmail.com
please feel free to share this blog and my GofundME. Follow my journey. love, blessing and prayer to ALL of you.
XOXO,
C A I T L I N.
http://gofundme.com/hf0jec
to have reached the end of something.
but...to reach the end of something, you have to go through it first, right? I've "RUN" two half marathons.
never have i wanted to reach the end of something so badly. but staring at the narrow pavement in front of me,
i knew one thing. i was going through it. ain't no way around it.
but the reward for enduring, for going through, was COMPLETION. add it to the list.
you then get to say, "i went THROUGH that."
CONQUERED IT.
and i came out on the other side of it. i had MADE it THROUGH. granted, i was LIMPING. CRYING. HURTING. IN PAIN. BARELY THERE. BUT I MADE IT. and my BODY. and my SOUL. and my SPIRIT. were better for it.
i can't help but to imagine what the journey of Jesus carrying the Cross was like for Him. in fact, in all honesty it's too much sometimes to even handle. sweat, blood, tears, mockery, beating, struggling, barely breathing, about to collapse (to name a FEW.)
i've had a lot of people tell me not to claim sickness, disease, and tell me this lot in my life.
i've had a lot of people who may see me with a lack of faith because i'm not healed yet. i've literally been diagnosed for 3 weeks.
i've had and heard a lot of opinions from a lot of people. and that's okay. we all have opinions. Jesus knows i have mine.
but all i keep hearing from the Holy Spirit is the word through.
i like to argue with God sometimes (SHOCK) and I began to think...Lord, I've been through enough. I mean honestly. HOW SELFISH!
i had a meeting with a guy the other day. It was a particularly bad day for me physically. I woke up nauseous, weak, and in so much pain i could barely breathe. there is a constant pit in my stomach and pain in my legs and arms that never goes away.
the same day, both my legs just gave out on me in the middle of target because i was so weak.
this guy, a Christian, listened to me talk about my journey. my testimony. my life before Christ. my life with Him now. I talked and talked (which is completely out of character for me...NOT)
finally, i said, i'm not sure why i'm going through it and i'm not sure when Jesus is going to heal me, and to be honest it doesn't matter. There is PURPOSE.
then, he looked at me and what he said was something that aligned with what the Holy Spirit had been speaking the whole time.
"you already have your healing. the pain that you are enduring is SiMiLiAR to the drops of blood that fell from his journey with the Cross, you have your healing already, but you have to go through a grueling, painful journey to get through to the other side."
UMMMM, HELLO.
Jesus knew redemption and victory would be His but He had to go through. THROUGH. THROUGH. THROUGH.
he endured. he went through. for others.
lots would disagree.
i agree completely.
it won't be paradise. but it will be something greater. an equipping and tools for ministry that will grow the Kingdom of God.
i don't know why Satan thinks that for some reason i'll lose my faith in this experience. which, in all honesty, has been the hardest journey.
to me, He just keeps building my resume.
there are hurting people in the world. ones that have been hurt as badly and even worse than i have been.
and one day, i will look across, face to face, eye to eye to those women and be able to say with confidence and assurance: i've been through what you're going through. and Jesus is faithful to bring you THROUGH.
so the sickness in my body?
GENESiS 50:20 "don't you see? you planned evil against me, but God USED those same plans for my good, as you see all around you right now- LiFE. and life for many people." (MSG)
so no. i'm not going to stop being vulnerable. i will stop talking about what i'm going through, or sharing my story. i will not stop encouraging others. i REFUSE to think of this journey as anything but an absolute honor from my Father.
who am i that He would choose to be a vessel for His glory, His kingdom, His miracles, His spirit? seriously, instead of complaining about our issues...(and if you don't know by now, i have just a tad going on....) why can't we THANK God for what He is going to do through us, if we would just be willing to let Him and OBEY Him when He calls us: "it's time. it's time to go through it."
since when did we tell God "I'll do anything for you, and then complain or rebuke off any bad thing that happens to us?
for those of you who disagree: sickness and disease is not my lot in life. it doesn't define me. and it will not be who i am forever. but it is right now.
and it is filling my life with grace, faith, trust, and the presence and comfort of the Holy Spirit like NEVER before.
yes. it's TERRIFYING. feeling like i'm losing my mind, not being able to think clearly. watching my cognitive thinking go down the drain.arthritis invading my joints. dibilitating muscle aches that make me move like a 90 yr old woman. positive blood tests. my central nervous system out of control. constant pain and anxiety.
i am honored that he would call me on a yet another journey to go through. yes, honored. flattered.
IN OUR WEAKNESS // HE IS MADE STRONG.
He HAS incredible plans. AND HE WILL GET THE GLORY. and in the meantime, people WILL come to know JESUS. my FAITH will be proclaimed LOUDER. people will see MIRACLES. my HEALING will come. my family will undoubtedly see JESUS in me. and who knows what's gonna happen.
but i can tell you one thing: it's gonna be GOOD. "that's why we can be so sure that every detail in our lives of love for God is worked into something good." R o M A N S 8:28 (MSG)
i have had an outpouring of people, some i know, and some i don't. your faith is inspiring. some in the Lyme community. some not. some Christians. some NOT. THAT MATTERS TO ME. AND IT MATTERS TO GOD. if i could inspire just one through this journey, if just one comes to know Jesus or even begins to stir in their faith, to me, that is VICTORY.
so yes, i think i'll make a choice everyday to write: to write about how i feel, what God is doing, brutal honesty. and i hope you'll keep reading and following. and by the way, to blog these days, it takes me hours. once a grammar freak, now i constantly mis spell words. my vision is almost completely blurry. my hands ache and ache and ache.
but i'm not stopping.
let me encourage you from one of my favorite and life verses, from the NLT but it's even more in your face in the MSG, which for anybody knows me is how i play. IN YO FACE. no filter. just real talk.
"if you only look AT us, you might as well miss the brightness. we carry the precious Message around in the unadorned clay pots of our ordinary lives. that's to prevent anyone from confusing God's incomparable power with us. as it is, there's not much chance of that. you know for yourselves that we're not much to look at. we've been surrounded and battered by troubles, but we're not demoralized; we're not sure what to do, but we know what God knows what to do, we've been spiritually terrorized, but God hasn't left our side, we've been thrown down, but we haven't been broken. what they did to Jesus, they do to us- trial and torture, mockery and murder; what Jesus did among them, he does in us- HE LIVES. our lives are at constant risk for Jesus's sake, which makes Jesus's life all the more evident in us. While we're going through the worst, you're getting in on the best." 2 coRiNTHiANS 4:7-12
INSTAGRAM: @caitlinannritchie TWITTER: @CaitlinRitchie6 GMAIL: ritchie.caitlin@gmail.com
please feel free to share this blog and my GofundME. Follow my journey. love, blessing and prayer to ALL of you.
XOXO,
C A I T L I N.
http://gofundme.com/hf0jec
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